Ahhhhh I finally have a job, and I couldn't be happier! I work at an immigration law firm in the World Trade Center in Downtown L.A. :) I don't know what my position is called (I'll name it "Phase Two" for now), but I think I'm a notch below paralegals. I help fill out forms and organize all the paperwork that is needed for each case. It sounds boring, but I'm enjoying it so far. One, I like organizing and perfecting things. Two, each case is like a puzzle because all of the information is out of order and incomplete. I'm kind of like a detective that puts together all the clues. The work I do is really important because the forms have to be perfect. There are really strict timelines, as some clients need visas by a certain date and such. So if a form is rejected because of a mistake on it, it takes another few months to fix it, and our client is screwed. Green cards hang in the balance.

The law firm is Christian-based, which means that their motivation is to honor God with their work. There are morning prayer meetings that Hamilton (fellow SP intern) and I intend to go to. How awesome is that? Also, it caters to Asian clients, and all but one employee is Asian. Finally, it's a female majority in the office... in a field dominated by males. By my calculations, this job fits all of my interests. Asian + Christian + international issues = me.

The one fact I can't escape is that God's hand was all over this. Haha. I'm so underqualified for this position. I have no previous experience in law, and I don't intend on going to law school. I actually avoided learning about immigration in IDS, haha, because I thought it was too complicated. Actually, I applied to be their Admin Assistant, but for some reason I got handed this other "Phase Two" position. Why? Who knows. Maybe they consider this admin... but it's definitely different from answering phones and making coffee. Also, the timing of everything was, well, only God's timing. I applied when they received a lot of clients - in fact, it's crunch time now. Additionally, they've been on a hiring spree... hiring five (and possibly six) people within the past month. In an office of less than ten people. Yeah. What the heck? Also, I was referred by Wendy, and that was a huge boost. And, of course, I met Wendy through BCF. Finally, this job is a) salary and b) at least a two year commitment (and SP is three years)! Ohhhhhh and lastly, I got Hamilton an interview, and they hired him as admin! AND the commute to work is less than half an hour! I could go on and on about God's provision.

I'm learning so much about immigration. It's crazy - they kind of tossed me in the middle of a case and said, "Go for it!" Haha. It was really overwhelming at first. Fortunately, my boss Tina (a lawyer, who is like 2nd or 3rd in command in the office) explains everything thoroughly and teaches me stuff every day. I really like her. The whole office feels so homey and comfortable. You don't feel the pretentious lawyer vibe that you imagine would exist. Oh, and here's the best part... in their kitchen/ break room, they have two Costco packs of Spam. What The Heck. IT WAS MEANT TO BEEEE.

I know I'm extremely fortunate because I know people who have spent more time and energy job searching and are still unemployed. I spent... maybe two months job hunting. It doesn't sound like very long, but trust me... when you're unemployed, it feels like forever.

To think I didn't want this job to begin with... how prideful of me. God has had so much grace on me. I am so grateful for this job.

My Auntie April was diagnosed with lung cancer last June. I was sitting in a hallway in Hedrick when my mom told me over the phone. We cried together.

I knew April was undergoing treatment, but that was it. My mom’s side values privacy, so I only heard details secondhand from my mom. For an entire year I didn’t see April – rare, since I used to see her every time I went home. April’s health got worse and worse. She stayed at home as long as she could until she needed to stay in the hospital. My grandma and Auntie Rhoda took care of her. In December, Rhoda was diagnosed with breast cancer. She underwent surgery, but April was her top priority. My family almost didn’t go to Hawaii last month because we thought April was going to pass away.

Last month (July) I was granted the privilege of visiting her in the hospital. I didn’t recognize her at all due to the cancer and chemo. Her voice was the only thing that stopped me from thinking she was a stranger. It was shocking to see how frail she had become. At that moment I thought, “This is what motivates people to become doctors. This is why people are so passionate about finding a cure for cancer.” In the hospital I could only talk to her for fifteen minutes before she became exhausted. I gave her updates about myself, but the topics felt so superficial in light of her sickness. I held her hand. She wept. I held in my tears – hoping to appear strong and faithful? Not wanting to burden her? Something.  

--

On Saturday morning my mom called and said the doctors gave April 24 – 48 hours to live. I debated the pros and cons of flying up to San Francisco. I felt guilty for even weighing my decision, but there were so many reasons not to fly up – I was going to the East Coast on Monday for a week, I had to completely move out of my apt., I wanted to say proper goodbyes to everyone in Westwood, I wanted to help clean our apt. before moving out, etc. Keo came over and prayed with me, and I realized I was struggling with “want” vs. “need” (Mark 1 Repeaters!). I wanted to go to the East Coast. I needed to support my aunt and family. So I booked a flight for yesterday (Sunday) morning and cancelled my East Coast trip. Most of Saturday was spent packing and hanging out with TGo, a roommate I’ll sorely miss when she moves back to Orosi/ Fresno.

Leaving Westwood on Sunday morning was really sad for me. I knew that when I came back to L.A., I would be driving to South L.A., not Westwood. More on that later. My cousin Aaron picked me up from SFO and drove me to the hospital. My aunt was sleeping and on a morphine drip when I arrived. Her breathing was labored. I sat in her room for a while, and then I was asked to go to the waiting room. In the late afternoon, my aunt passed away.

We stayed in her room for a while to grieve and say our goodbyes.

Some moments are indescribable. Packing for a funeral that may or may not happen. Hugging my grandma and feeling her body heave with sobs. Reading the Lord’s Prayer to April (“Your will be done”).   

--

Here is an excerpt from a letter I wrote to April a few months ago:

“April, I am grateful for your presence in my life. I know that you care about me and that I can depend on you. One of the earliest memories I have with you is going to the San Francisco Zoo. Do you remember that? :) Thank you for investing your time and energy in me. I appreciate how you’ve advised me, and I know that you want the best for me. April, one of my favorite things about you is the way you light up the room with your joy. When you greet me, you have a genuine smile on your face, and you’re excited to see me. Your humor, your zeal for life, and your laugh are infectious. I’d like to think that I inherited these qualities from you.

I admire how you selflessly served Gung Gung (my grandpa) and honored him. The fact that you would put your career on hold to care for him is evidence that you care deeply for your family. I know that not many people saw how hard you worked, but I saw your efforts every time I visited. Thank you for serving him, and thank you for showing me what it looks like to sacrifice in love. You set the bar high.”

The only thing worse than being unemployed is being unemployed and having a career counselor as a mom. 

once again. Sorry Xanga.

Uh... what's new? How about 9 MORE DAYS UNTIL GRADUATION?! Btw, congrats to all you SJSU-ers. :)

The year seems to be speeding up as I approach graduation. Sigh. I'm trying to soak it all in and give God my anxieties about school, friends, parents, and job hunting.

The past few weeks:
- Took my UCLA senior portrait yesterday!!! I'm going to pass out wallet-sized photos and write on the back "K.I.T."
- Bought my cap and gown! Eeeeeeee!
- Last Sproul small group :(
- V-Team celebration dinner
- Last IV leaders meeting ever
- Sisters Appreciation Night
- Robin's birthday - Palomino & bonfire!
- Senior dinner hosted by IV staff
- Gina's back in L.A.! Saw her a record 3x in one week.
- Made cinnamon rolls from scratch - including the dough
- Decided to COMMIT to Servant Partners for three years! (I'll be living in South L.A. the next year, hopefully working in the vicinity, meeting my neighbors, and living with other SP interns.)

Coming up:
- SENIOR CATALYST!
- Taking pictures in our caps and gowns around campus
- Finals (end on Thurs.)
- Graduation 09! Parents & dad's side flying down.
- Summer Con
- Home for a week, flying in on 6/29
- Hawaii w/ parents & dad's side for two weeks in July

God is Good.